|Reflectors (c) Jing Villareal|
I might have said this before (or, you know, a million bazillion times), but I really want to be a full-time writer. The goal is possible and I’m doing everything I can to make it happen sooner rather than later, but things get in the way. Things like money and fear of falling into debt again and the stress of having too much on my plate and not enough time to give the things I care about the time they deserve.
So what should I do in a situation like this? I see the end getting closer and I see the things standing in my way and I see the huge gaping chasm I could fall into if I take a step in the wrong direction…
This is where priorities come in handy. What is truly important to me and is my fear strong enough to keep me from getting them? The more I think about it, the more I realize my priorities look something like this:
There are a bunch of other things on that list in random places, but for the purposes of this post, those are my priorities. I’ve been in debt before and I got myself out of it. I’ve never had a ton of money and although it’s nice right now to be able to afford things like trips to BEA and writing conferences, I could survive without them. More and more, though, I’m realizing that I’m miserable when I have to spend five days a week (and some weekends) working on things that, honestly, don’t matter to me AT ALL. I have a growing number of opportunities in the writing world lining up in front of me and I won’t be able to take them all (or take them on and do them justice) unless I make some sacrifices as far as money goes. At least in the short term. Honestly, I’m hoping that my sacrifices now will pay off over time.
It’s a scary thing, though, to be standing on the edge of that cliff. I’m not entirely sure I can see the other side, so, if I jump, I very well might fall. And I don’t think there’s a safety net.
The thing is, even with the fear of falling, the possibility of flying still seems worth the risk.