Category Archives: Random

Responsibility: Should We All Ruffle Some Feathers?

We can’t figure out why, but my mom gets a lot of magazines for free. It’s usually Men’s Health, US Weekly, and things like that, but my favorite is Entertainment Weekly. In the most recent issue, they present an article written by comedian/actor/writer/director Ricky Gervais about his controversial performance as the host of last year’s Golden Globes Awards. Essentially, he offended almost everyone in Hollywood at some point or another with biting commentary and off-color jokes. But isn’t that what comedians are supposed to do?

Entertainment Weekly gave Gervais the chance to explain his reasoning and his views on the purpose of comedy as we head into the 2012 Golden Globes. Surprisingly (maybe), Gervais is hosting it again this year.

Well written and insightful, the article talks about how sometimes what he says in no way relates to how people interpret his intentions. A particular joke about Scientology made last year, for example, was not an attack on any member of Hollywood royalty, it was an attack on an organized religion that tries to control and conform human behavior. All in all, it made me actually want to watch the award show this year–something I never do.

I tried to find the full article online, but didn’t have any luck. If you can, stop by a drug store or doctor’s office and look for this piece. It’s well worth reading, and not just for writers who (I believe) have the same responsibility Gervais attributes to comedians. This article shines a light on a deficit in human understanding, one that’s behind more arguments and wars than I want to contemplate.

Also, if anyone does find the article online, let me know?

Books: Their Secret Lives

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Having worked in a bookstore, I know exactly how hard this was to accomplish. Kudos to Type and all their volunteers!

Retail: The Gripes of A Bookstore Employee

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Having spent most of my day at a mall (eww), it brings me back to my days as a retail employee during the holiday season. When the bookstores began to die, a few stores gave up the veneer of complacency and decided to tell customers exactly why they’ve gotten on our nerves over the years. Having lived through two years of Borders I can vouch that all of these are true. All of them and then some. >.< So, in the spirit of the season, here are some things NOT to do when you go into most stores. Chances are if you avoid these errors, you'll get better service. 😉

Things We Never Told You: Ode To A Bookstore Death

We hate when a book becomes popular simply because it was turned into a movie.

It confused us when we were asked where the non-fiction section is.

Nicholas Sparks is not a good writer … if you like him, fine, but facts are facts.

We greatly dislike the phrase “Quick question.” It’s never true. And everyone seems to have one.

Your summer reading list was our summer reading NIGHTMARE. Also, it’s called summer reading, not three days before school starts reading.

It’s true that we lean to the left and think Glenn Beck is an idiot.

We always knew when you were intently reading Better Homes and Gardens, it was really a hidden Playboy.

Most of the time when you returned books you read them already – and we were onto you.

Limit One Coupon did not mean one for every member of your family – this angered us. Also, we did know what coupons were out.

It never bothered us when you threatened to shop at Barnes & Noble. We’d rather you do if you’re putting up a stink.

“I was just here last week and saw this book there” meant nothing to us. The store changed once a week.

When you walked in and immediately said, “I’m looking for a book,” what you really meant to say is, “I would like you to find me a book.” You never looked. It’s fine, it’s our job – but let’s be correct about what’s really happening here.

If you don’t know the author, title, or genre, but you do know the color of the cover, we don’t either. How it was our fault that we couldn’t find it we’ll never understand.

We were never a daycare. Letting your children run free and destroy our section destroyed a piece of our souls.

Oprah was not the “final say” on what is awesome. We really didn’t care what was on her show or what her latest book club book was. Really.

When you returned your SAT books, we knew you used them. We thought it wasn’t fair – seeing that we are not a library.

Funny: In The Meantime…

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Sorry about the absence! I found out earlier this week that I have extra paid time off I didn’t know about, so I shall be taking it next week. That decision, however, means that I have a lot to finish up before then. PLUS, my sister arrived from Wednesday night. A real post shall be coming later, but in the meantime here’s something to amuse, annoy, and keep you entertained. 😀

Photo found here.

Edited to add: I totally miscalculated. I’m just getting home and it’s after midnight my time. So… posts tomorrow! Three, in fact, to make up for my absence!

Random: If They Say So…

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It has been decided. If my everyone in my office was the cast in the Munsters, I’d be the blonde girl. I’m not sure if this is supposed to be a compliment or not. O.o?

Regardless of the doubtful compliment of the statement, I laughed for a solid five minutes when they told me this. I think they think I’m normal! 😀

Writing: Does It Ever Get To You?

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Have you ever gotten so deep into your writing that it starts to get to you? I feel like my characters are starting to stalk me while I sleep.

This morning, for example, I jerk awake at 6:30 am (a full hour earlier than I need to be awake) convinced someone is knocking on my window. No one was there, of course.

Still, even though I don’t remember my dreams in detail (I never do), I feel as though I’ve spent the last few nights living in the world I’ve created. It’s hard to explain why without giving things away, but let’s just say it’s starting to creep me out just a little. At the same time, It’s really awesome. 😀

Musings: Pomegranates Are Messy

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I vote that pomegranates offically be named the messiest fruit to eat. I tried recently because it’s been years and I forgot what a chore it is. This is what the pomegranate looked like before:

And after:

Eating this fruit requires a knife, the use of your nails, and about half a roll of paper towels. And I STILL ended up with incredibly sticky fingers and a tupperware full of scraps.

The question that popped into my head while eating this (and thus prompting this post) is how in the world did pomegranate seeds cause Persephone’s downfall?! I really hope that she was offered just the seeds because if she took the time to peel and eat this thing and still blamed it on Hades, then she’s a liar. The process of peeling open one of these deceptively pretty fruits involves too much work and time. If she had to do it herself, she had plenty of chances to realize, “Hey, maybe I shouldn’t eat this if I ever want to go back to my mom.”

(Okay, confession: The before and after photos are NOT the same pomegranate as the whole questioning process didn’t start until I was halfway done with the stupid but delicious thing and therefor it didn’t occur to me to take a picture until it was far too late. Still, it looks close enough 😉 )

… And, yes, these are the kind of weird random thoughts that run through my head.

Update: Daylight Savings Sucks

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Years ago the government apparently tried to help farmers by giving them more daylight (is it only me that thinks someone in Congress just wanted to pretend they were magical?). Now, twice a year, all of our clocks, watches, cell phones, computers, other assorted handheld devices all end up arguing over what time it is. When I woke up this morning I found myself stuck somewhere in a two hour gap. None of the four devices in my room that tell me the time agreed with any of the others. My cell tells me it’s 8:01 right now, my clock tells me it’s 10:00, my computer says 9:01 and my iPad says 8:45. WTH? And what use is daylight savings these days? NONE! Not even to those farmers for whom the whole thing started. A few years ago the government changed the dates of daylight savings, but couldn’t they have saved us all the hassle and done away with it entirely? Can’t Florida at least do away with it? Come on, Florida! Be smart for once!

Anyway… That’s my rant for the day. Enjoy your extra hour (or two…?). I shall be locked into the new desk and desk chair I bought yesterday (YAY!) and writing from dawn to dusk tonight (have to make up for the entire afternoon I spent putting together my new desk and desk chair…). Good luck, if you’re doing the same.

Funny: What Kind Of Teachers Did You Have?

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XKCD FTW!

Hopefully no one reading this never had a teacher who fell into the third category. 😉

Random: When Good Cake Goes Bad

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This weekend I went to dinner with some coworkers and while the dinner itself was okay, dessert became hilarious. One of my coworkers (we’ll call her C) decided she wanted a little bit of something sweet, hopefully lemon. They didn’t have anything with lemon, but the waiter recommended this vanilla cake. It came and we were all shocked:

They call this little?! We put our surprise aside and C dug in, only to decide two bites in that the cake was not only huge, but horrible. “This cake is like the great wall of china from hell!” she declared with gusto. Then she attacked.

Apparently, this is what happens when C decides she doesn’t like the dessert! She actually smashed it even further after this point (repeatedly insisting it was “Bad, bad, bad!”

All in all, I don’t think I’ve ever been so amused by food. 😀